Acceptance. When enough is enough.

"I always have an existential crisis in my third week of a new adventure."  I laughed aloud when I read this text from a good friend.  It's one reason we have good friends right?  To help us put things in perspective.

Last week was my third week here in Haiti and I was indeed full of doubt. As I got comfortable with my routine of life here, I began to wonder if I am 'doing enough'.  

This week that seems silly.  Of course it is enough that I am living in Haiti, getting myself to the yoga studio every day to share ideas, work with great people, and teach 5 classes a week.  Yes this is enough for now. Enough is simply enough.

I have grand visions of writing articles, doing community outreach and employee wellness programs in Haiti, and last week I started worrying that I wasn't doing enough to work toward that vision.

As a typical over-acheiver type I was beating myself up over it.

Luckily, I have a mindfulness practice that let me see myself beating myself up, and I checked in with it. I asked where the feeling of "not enough" was coming from. (I also work with a lovely life coach Cora of Sexy Soul Wellness who helped me delve deeper into this.)

I realized that the part of me wants to 'do more' is my ego that wants to tell great stories and be recognized for great achievements during my time here.  As I looked closer at that, I realized that a more important part of me, my center, my soul, is not ready to do more and has a different agenda.

One of my favorite Rumi quotes is, "The soul is here for its own joy."  The joy my soul currently seeks is one of healing and establishing a strong base for a fire that can burn powerfully.

Yes, I want to accomplish great things and I want to be recognized for the work I do. But I am ready for once in my life to accept that enough is enough and that I can take my time to build something with a solid foundation.  If I focus on accepting what I am willing and eager to do now, and let enough be enough- then I am sure that great things will follow.

With love and acceptance, Lizandra

Credit for the photo goes to my good friend and fellow sojourner on the journey of the dance between acceptance and drive - Kristin Adair.